Curhat

Couple moments : do we have to share or just keep it between us ?

People were uploading their relationship moments on instagram,path, or any other social media. The biggest example you can check right now is the Glen Alinskie & Chelsea Olivia instagram feed, From their travels, their night-outs, and even their wedding are in their instagram profiles. They let it all out for the public, so their fans could see their love life.

For me a PDA is always acceptable. Sharing the love for the people around us is never a bad thing in my opinion, and it is a thousand times better then spreading the speech of hate, anger,etc.
Some couples that keeping their relationship so secret isn’t a bad idea either. Well i couldn’t give you an example but, so many celebs from hollywood or maybe korean stars who keeps their love life so secret that nobody knows that they’re living their happiest moment together without a public disturbance.

now the question is…

should you/i/we keep our relationship for ourselves,
or,
should you/i/we/ let our relationship for others to see how happy can you be in a healthy relationship ?

Let’s talk about the plus minus about these 2 options we could pick. First of all, the keep-between-us-relationship. Now let’s think about positive things we could take from a private relationships shall we ? we could pick the most simple thing from it, which is you will NOT have a pressure from other individuals, such as fans, friends, family, ex (?), etc. Other than unnecessary pressure, you could also be safe from any kind of gossip, since you didn’t let many people know that you have a special relationship, you won’t get many rumours or gossips about you two.
A bonus point if somehow it ends up in marriage, people will be in kind of a shock (?) seeing your relationship successfully go to the final phase, without any publicity from any of the social media.
Now let’s talk about the PDA in social media.

for me sharing your relationship in the social media is a brave thing to do.

Everyone who have an access to your profile will see the relationship that you shared to the internet world, Your mum, your dad, your best friend, your friends, your enemies, your dogs, your evil ex, everyone. You showed that you’re currently happy with the new person that comes into your life, That you didn’t afraid to let people know that you’re now have a new relationship you can build on.
You are not afraid of failure, why ? because if your relationship fails the probability of people who knows about your relationship will notice that your love life somehow didnt go the right way, the total opposite thing that is going to happen if you let it be a privacy between you two. And that’s why i think it was a brave thing to do.
As i was saying, sharing love to others is always a thousand times better than spreading the speech of hate. and these are just 1 or 2 bits of benefits you could have, there are so many other reasons why it’s okay to let your relationship be public or private.
For me personally, i would like to stay in the middle from these 2 options, there’s black and white, yin and yang, x and y,you and me, us. Someone said to me “Sesuatu yang dipaksakan itu tidak baik” and it will never be. So, something that is too much like someone who is posting a video about yourself crying over such a simple problems and calling it a vlog, in my opinion it was not a bright thing to do. So what i’m going to do is i’ll share what people might need to know such as, anniversary, birthday, etc and let people see that i have a happy relationship.
So i think that’s all from me, for now. I don’t know when the next post will arrive but just in case… stay tune. Ciao !

Lost.

Photo by : Nick Falkner

No, not that tv shows about some dudes and chicks who got lost in a deserted island no.

I’m talking about lost in the place where you shouldn’t be.

yeah.

(i hope) It’s going to be deep.

yeah.

 

First thing first, i have to ask. do you ever feel lonely in a crowded place ? yes, i’m talking about the gorgeus photo from Nick Falkner on the above, then you might be interested about what i’m going to write today. And yes, i almost always feel that thing. if you do too, hi5 bro.

do you have friends ? or a community ? ever feel like you’re being unwanted ? maybe you’re getting a loneliness, note that lonely is different than being alone. Loneliness could happen in a very very crowded place like when you’re waiting for the train to comes up, when you’re in traffic jam, in class, or even in your own house. see, loneliness happens when we feel anxious feelings about a lack of connection or communication with others.It could happen by emotional things, or maybe social events, or even mental state.

People can experience loneliness for many reasons, like the shortage of friendship relations during childhood or teenage, or the physical lack of meaningful people around a person. At the same time, loneliness may be a symptom of another social or psychological problem, such as depression.a lot of teen experience loneliness after a breakup, for the people who already married,a divorce or loss of any important long-term relationship. In these problems, it may come both from the loss of a specific person and from the withdrawal from social circles lead to by the event or the correlated sadness.

There is a small thin wall between lonely and alone. Loneliness is happens cause lack of connection between relation, while the other, alone is caused by lack of contact with other people, like i said, a person could feel lonely in a crowded place, while instead one can be alone in their own favourite place and not feel lonely at all. Being alone is not that bad, for example people who is ten to being alone could explore their creativity to the max.

Solitude has been linked with melancholy, and is thus a jeopardy factor for suicide,i.e. comities or altruistic conceptions, as the main reason for what he called egoistic suicide.In adults, solitude is a major precipitant of dejection and alcoholism. People who are convivially isolated may report poor slumber quality, and thus have diminished restorative processes. Solitude has additionally been linked with a Schizoid character type in which one may optically discern the world differently and experience gregarious alienation, described as the self in expatriation.

There is a way to avoid this, you know… like, Challenge yourself to take the initiative in convivial relationships. Don’t wait for people to approach you: you should approach them. Ask the person if they optate to chat or get a coffee. You must always show interest in other people afore they will show interest in you, if they ever do.Work on ameliorating and making yourself blissful. Conventionally, when we’re devoting most of our time to other people, we incline to neglect ourselves. If you’re going through a period of solitude, capitalize on it by doing the things that you optate to do for yourself. This is a sublime opportunity and you should be blissful!

This last paragraph is not important as other paragraphs, but hey. i’m just trying to help other who feels the same like me, i’m one of the people who is having a stress by a loneliness. just for your information, i have stopped coming to my community’s meeting, because… i don’t really feel accepted there, sad. i know. although i love them for being what they are, i still love them, i still have a lot of memories there, and even if i don’t attend mandatory meeting anymore, i still have 1 more year to be with them, and i decided to use that span of time to the fullest. i don’t have to tell what the name of my community right ? yes. thank you.                                                                          and also, if you ever feel so alone, contact me ! maybe i could help ! here. i’ll give you my personal’s chat messaging accounts ! 🙂

LINE : Basyandira

Whatsapp : (+62)83897780540

Snapchat : Basyadira

this three are the apps that i opened regularly when i was bored, i open it up on my phone mostly, so i could respond ASAP. anyway, today’s story end here. i hope you have a good friends and have a nice week ! bye ! 😀